Monday, September 14, 2009

Risk perverse

I spent five hours of my life - five hours I will never get back - talking about health and safety today. I felt as though I had been exsanguinated by some hellish health and safety vampire and frankly started to wish a nasty and unforeseen accident would befall me so that I could escape.

I'm not averse per se to health and safety. Accidents and injuries aren't good and we have to take responsibility for people's safety, especially when like me you work with youngsters. However, it does seem to have become a bit of an industry with leaflets galore, initials and acronyms coming out of every orifice and procedures, protocols and policies in anal abundance. In fact so anal is health and safety that I'm sure you have to have an extra arsehole to qualify as a fully paid up expert.

To alleviate my boredom, I ran my own secret risk assessment today. The risk of me expiring from sheer frustration and boredom was sky high and I was sorely tempted to rush up a rickety ladder and play Russian Roulette with the shredder just for the hell of it. Five hours!!!

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