Thursday, August 27, 2009

A star


So yet again an eight year old has got an A star in GCSE Maths. Here's me , forty ahem and the very word division gives me a headache. When I was eight my main preoccupation was learning to dance like Pans People!

I know it's wrong but, despite being a woman of deeply maternal leanings who loves children, I find myself actively disliking child geniuses and don't get me started on their bloody parents. This particular one has not only achieved an A star but plays half an orchestra's worth of instruments and speaks - speaks mark you - Latin!

In my fetid imagination, I like to picture the child being hot-housed by socially awkward parents who do algebra over breakfast, don't watch TV and file their hair. I'm secretly hoping the father is a weirdo in sandals and a beard and the mother wears skirts with a high waistline and pork pie shoes, just like the parents who appeared on 'Ask the Family'. I need to think this as if they are normal, it raises the bar considerably for we ordinary parents. If they are normal, why can't the rest of us bring up a child genius who can speak Ancient Greek and has Grade 8 piano by the time they are six?

Pans People were good though.












2 comments:

SeaThreePeeO said...

Because we don't stand over our children breathing down the necks and continuously pushing them so we can live vicariously through their achievements!

That's what I think anyway.

Purple Passages said...

I like your style. I can't think of anything worse than pushing your child to do GCSE Maths at 8 - well for me anyway as I can't do maths. :-)